Turbo FM

Back to form this week with another pumping track to get you going.

Before anyone gets in there first, no it isn't me in the video.......

Spring is nearly here........

It seems that all the last few weeks have brought is rain. On the odd days where it has been dry i've been busy so haven't had the chance to get out.
I've also had an exceptional bad run of luck. A broken set of glasses was the least of my troubles (still no response from Wiggle by the way). Next to fail was my wireless router but fortunately Belkin customer service is a lot different from Wiggle. I called them, they emailed me a freepost label and i've posted the old one back for a new replacement to come by return mail. No quibbles, just great customer care.
This was the least of my worries though when we came home to a burst hot water tank. Parting with that much money when it's not a bicycle related purchase is a real shame. Could it get any worse? Yep. My 3 year old son is struck with an illness that requires 7 days off nursery and here's me with no annual leave left.
Still, it all seems to be in hand now so I can concentrate on the bike again.
The classics season is now upon us and i've decided that it's probably my favourite time in the cycling calendar, so much so in fact that i've sunk to new geek lows and have been watching the untelevised cycling on the live internet feeds.... in Belgian. Still it's good to watch and you had to feel for Juan Antonio Flecha to put in that much work and get pipped on the line on Saturday.
I dusted off the bike for the first time since last week's trip to Brighton and headed off into the country lanes with a couple of the guys. Felt good to be out and we managed to steal some Spring sunshine. The route wasn't billed as a hilly one but there was a fair bit of rolling road with a few punchy little climbs thrown in for good measure.
At this time of year, I know base miles count but i've found that my biggest progress in the last year has been my leg power and I think that comes down to sprints and hill climbs. As often as I can, I sprint up the shorter hills until my legs give out or I reach the top - whichever comes first! I think this helps with learning to recover quickly too.
In the end it was 55 pretty hard miles with a few bonus climbs thrown in at the end. I was pretty ruined by the time I got home and had to chuck a protein bar down my throat and slip into something more comfortable - my Maxgear compression tights.......

Men at “work”

It seems everywhere I go at the minute the roads resemble a war zone. Potholes, road works, temporary traffic lights, burst water mains and essential gas works. I wouldn’t mind so much but the same roads seem to be continually dug up all the time and whenever I go past the sites are always devoid of people working. There’s a “men at work” sign but no actual men at work.


I seem to be dodging the same potholes day in, day out. The same ones that I reported and have now been decorated with a ring of spray paint by the local authority. Surely it can’t take much longer to chuck a bit of tarmac in there rather than carry out road graffiti?

Even when the work does get completed, we’re left with a patchwork of repairs where savings are attempted as no contractor wants to resurface an entire stretch of road. So, what are we going to do about it? Nothing because we’re British and we just ignore it and retain that stiff upper lip.

I suppose the only benefit of these road works are seeing sights like I saw today, a workman in a mini tipper trying to get some four wheel drift on a corner…….

Was that Joe 90 on a bicycle?

I took a bit of stick on the weekend for my choice of eyewear. With the customer service chimps at Wiggle on a tea break, I had what is commonly referred to as “a situation”.

Two pairs of broken specs and a long ride to Brighton meant that I needed a quick solution. I’ve got a pair of Oakley Radar glasses on my wish list for later in the year and I don’t want to risk spending much money until I buy the Radars in case Wiggle finally get around to sending me a replacement pair, so I looked at alternatives.

The first option would be to ride without eyewear but I’ve had so many insects and stones ping off glasses in the past that it just isn’t worth the risk of riding without. Eye protection also affords the luxury of not crying after every 30mph descent. I’ve had the odd occasion where I’ve ridden without glasses and reached my destination looking like I’ve just watched E.T for the first time.

So it seems that my only other option would be to pick up a cheap set of glasses to tide me over. All I could really find without waiting for a mail order delivery were around the £15 mark which is a bit more than I wanted to pay and would require a special trip to a bike shop. I then remembered a discussion on the Bikeradar forum where people were singing the praises of safety glasses.

I had to go into town anyway so whilst I was out I called into Clas Ohlson to see what I can find. For anyone who has never been in Clas Ohlson, it’s reminiscent of Ikea minus all the cheap chipboard furniture. I can’t think of an item that Clas Ohlson doesn’t sell. It even does the odd bit of bike stuff and is particularly cheap for KMC chain links and gear/brake cables.

So I find myself hunting to see what I can find, when I come across these little beauties:

Now, I remember CAT boots from my school days but never knew they offered safety glasses too. I had to get them, just for the nostalgia. £10.98 for the clear version seemed a snip and they’d come in handy for any DIY jobs that crop up later in the year too.

I went home smug with my new bargain purchase.

That’s when the mocking started. The frames were a bit on the big side but I thought this would help protect me from the wind even if I did look a bit like Ali G in them.

How did they perform on the ride then? Absolutely faultlessly, better in fact than any glasses I’ve previously worn. I felt no wind rush around my eyes despite a 40mph descent and the optics were absolutely crystal clear with no distortion.

I’m now in an even bigger dilemma - fashion or function?

Turbo FM

Something slightly different for you this week on Turbo FM. Not much of a track to listen to on the turbo but maybe something to help you reflect on the pain after.

Sit back, relax and picture yourself having finished an epic ride, relaxing in the late evening summer's sun with a beer in hand, bathed in the smug satisfaction that a hard day in the saddle can bring.

A classic from the man in black:

The cost of saving

I have a love/hate relationship with online retailers. I love their pricing but more often than not, hate their service.

That’s why I try as much as possible to shop locally and keep the local wheels of economy turning.

I’m fortunate enough that Geoffrey Butler cycles are my local bike shop (http://www.gbcycles.co.uk/)
I've always found their staff to be really helpful and whenever I’ve had any warranty issues, they’ve gone beyond their usual duty and really looked after me. Their January sales are legendary too. I recently picked up a pair of Fulcrum Racing 3 wheels at a genuine 20% off.

Sometimes though, it’s necessary to go elsewhere, often where pricing dictate or your local bike shop don’t stock a particular brand or item. In this situation, I’ve found that I’ve been pretty happy with my purchases and occasionally make a substantial saving that warrants an online order. Regardless of the saving though, there’s one thing that often lacks - Customer Service.

I’m going to give you a few examples of differing service so you can see what I mean.

Geoffrey Butler – the STI Shimano 105 shifter on my 16 month old bike stopped working. I took it into Geoffrey Butler on the Saturday and by the following week, they’ve removed the shifter, sent it to Shimano and refitted a whole new set. The cost? £20 for some new bar tape, end caps and a token labour gesture.

Fudge Cycles (bike shop that also do mail order and online retail) – The powerlink on my SRAM chain breaks after 3 months use. Quick email to them and I receive a replacement link, free of charge in the post within a couple of days.

Wiggle (online retailer) – based on recommendation, I bought a pair of DHB glasses with interchangeable lenses which broke where the frame meets the nose section. This frame is designed to flex when the lenses are interchanged. All DHB items carry a lifetime warranty so I emailed Wiggle but received no response. I was surprised to find a replacement pair arrive in the post within a couple of days. It would have been nice to have a reply to my email but I appreciated the replacement.

Four months on, the same thing has happened on the replacement pair – a break in exactly the same spot. So, I email Wiggle. No response. I email on two more occasions. Still no response. It’s been two weeks now and I’m still without a replacement pair or a reply to any of my correspondence.

This whole incident has raised a few questions. Will an initial saving on a purchase outweigh the final cost?

When magazines recommend items, are they driven by actual real life experience or on behalf of the advertising team?

Will I ever receive a replacement set of specs?

Tune in again to find out. Guess where I’ll be shopping from now on………

A February trip to the seaside

London to Brighton on a bicycle is an iconic ride that many aspire to but for cycling enthusiasts is more a “rite of passage”, especially living in the South East.


I’ve completed the journey several times now (and back!) but arriving at Brighton Pier having got there under my own steam always fills me with a warm glow, even on a cold February morning.

Ordinarily, we save the seaside trips until a warmer season but an opportunity to palm the kids off with the in-laws meant that I was able to undertake the journey with my better half on her first bike ride to the coast, coinciding with her longest ride yet.

Whenever we head to Brighton, we take a less direct route than the British Heart Foundation annual ride and head into the country lanes. It’s slightly longer but does offer more tranquil, traffic free riding with some added lumpiness towards the end, whilst still being able to enjoy the majestic Ditchling Beacon.

Unlike the BHF annual ride, there was no walking up the Beacon yesterday and I’m pleased to say that we all made it to the coast with one puncture providing the only drama of the ride.

My dirty little secret.

Something else happened to me yesterday and it’s been a bit of a decision as to whether I post about it or not. I like to share what I can with this blog but sometimes it’s a borderline judgment as to whether I should write about it or not.

I feel in this case, I should share my experience with you, in case you ever find yourself in a similar position.

My journey home wasn’t quite as straightforward as I made out in my previous post. I had a run in with a lorry which led to an incident that I’d rather just erase form my mind forever.

As per usual in this country, they’re digging up the roads around where I live yet again and so it’s a slalom course just to reach my front door. As I turned off the main road into the residential maze where I live, a tipper truck was reversing to unload some ballast into a newly dug hole.

I waited until he stopped reversing. The road weasel directing him looked at me and then shouted something at the driver, which I assumed was to let me past. I went to go around the lorry and drew level, just at the same time he decided that he wanted to pull away again. Fortunately, he saw me in his mirror but I still had to unclip and hop up onto the grass verge to avoid a DKNWHY pancake.

Next, came the toot of the horn and a string of expletives from the cab. I don’t bother to retaliate in these situations anymore for the simple fact that it just achieves nothing and since having a family to support, I try to avoid confrontation.

I think it was more communication thing but in future, I will exercise more caution and wait until I’m entirely certain that my route is safe. Lesson learnt.

Unfortunately, this wasn’t the end of my problem. I put the bike in the garage and set about removing my glasses and helmet. Something was bothering me though, a distinctive odour. Dog faeces.

I looked around and then it dawned on me, when I unclipped and had that brief dismount onto the grass verge, I’d found the only spot of grass in the locality that had a higher ratio of shit than grass. My heart sank as the bile began to rise.

For people that know me, I’m a little OCD about cleanliness and dog shit is up there with my biggest hates. In my opinion, people that don’t clean up after their dog should be shot or at least put on nappy duty in a retirement home. I detest them but would piss on them if they were on fire, just for the simple excuse to clean up after myself and teach them how to do it.

I now had a situation. How the hell do you clean dog shit from a set of Look Keo Classic carbon pedals and cleats?

Fortunately, the pedals were only lightly soiled so a baby wipe and a spray of disinfectant did the job but the cleats were a different story.

First, I tried taking the disinfectant spray and a hose pipe to offending shoe. It was more a hopeful, token effort though as we both knew it was a futile attempt. It was going to be a big job, removing the big job.

So, I’m above the sink, trying not to gag as I take an allen key to the cleat bolts. I end up removing them all and then with a mix of chemicals and scalding water get it all clean and begin the refit process. I think I’m finished but still can’t shift the aroma from my nostrils. Then I see it, the offending piece, wedged into the bottom of the hex hole on the bolt. I wanted to scream. What am I going to do now??!! Armed with a selection of cotton buds, I set to work and after minutes of toil finished the clean before throwing myself into the shower where I almost sat sobbing, reminiscent of that scene in The Crying Game.

Now that it’s out in the open, I never want to speak of this incident again.

El Bonko - he comes when you least expect it

They say you always remember your first time, that it will stay with you your entire life. The rush and excitement, followed by the lack of energy, low and lack of self respect.

I think it happened to me yesterday, although I’m not quite sure. Being a virgin at these experiences, I’m still sitting here wondering whether I did have my first time or whether it was something else and I’ve got it all wrong.

The day started off pleasantly enough and I decided to go for a hard session to get the lungs going and get the legs pumping. Maybe, I should clarify myself a bit more at this point and explain that I’m talking about cycling and the dreaded bonk.

Over the winter, I’ve taken things relatively easy and haven’t done any hard distance sessions on the road for quite some time. Towards the end of 2010, I had a few outings with my club on the weekly chain gang and felt quite good.

For anyone who doesn’t know what a chain gang is, it’s effectively a ride at race pace where the aim if for a string of riders to maintain a fast pace, taking turns on the front to maintain a rhythm and share the workload of riding into the wind.

Now the spell of bad weather has calmed down and temperatures have risen to the point that my penis no longer looks like a shrivelled prune at the end of a ride, the evening chain gang has started up again and my excuses for missing the last few are starting to wear thin. I need to get involved again.

My first step started yesterday with a solo attempt on the chain gang route in an effort to familiarise myself with the roads again and give it my all in an endeavour to ruin myself. The point being that if I can go all out and finish on my own, it will be a breeze with 6-7 other people riding with me.

Needless to say, I achieved what I set out to do. I ruined myself.

It all started ok and I maintained a 20mph+ average for the first 16.5 miles from home but then when I hit the turn and faced back into the wind, the wheels began to fall off my wagon. My speed went down and when I hit the climb at Earlswood, I was a spent force. I just had nothing more to give and ended up getting home after 33 miles with an average speed of 16.5mph.

Was it the bonk or just early poor season fitness? I don’t know. I think the safest bet is to assume it was the bonk and use it as an excuse to eat more Jaffa Cakes.

Turbo FM

This week's inspiration to turbo train is brought to you by the jilted generation.

Spitfire by The Prodigy.

By the way, i've been chucking elbows in the sprints too.

Contador

Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past couple of days or hold no interest in cycling whatsoever, you’ll already know that Alberto Contador has been cleared of intentional doping by the Spanish cycling federation.

I honestly don’t know how I feel about it and I think that I’m not alone in my feelings.

For the past few years, Contador has been Mr Cycling. His athletic prowess, unique riding style and dominating attacks have obliterated the opposition and monopolised the grand tours. It’s been brilliant to watch.

The 2009 Tour de France played out like a feature film where the smaller, playground wimp was bullied by the brash American, determined to take his lunch money, only for the shy wallflower to rise up and beat the bully into submission. I warmed to him, hell, I even cheered for him.

We applauded him, placed him up high on that pedestal and then worshipped him alongside the other historic greats.
The foundations of the king’s statue began to crack in 2010, following the chain “incident” with Andy Schleck. Fans stood by him, “Alberto doesn’t cheat, it must be a mistake. He didn’t know Schleck had dropped his chain.”
I want to believe the innocence, even though common sense mocks my naivety. It clouded the end of the race and the win became a dark stain on the yellow jersey.

Rumours then begin to emerge about a failed drug test but the reports aren’t clear as to whether it’s accidental or not. I want them to be false but then I don’t want dopers in the sport. It’s like denying your wife’s having an affair or that your brother’s a drug addict. The signs are there and you know common sense says the instincts are right but you just don’t want to believe the rumours that shatter the illusion.

As it stands, he’ll race and whether the ban is upheld in future months after the appeal is an issue we’ll see as, if or when it happens. One thing is for certain, I’ll be upset regardless of the decision and it is another low blow to the sport of cycling.

Why i'll never be a professional cyclist.........

I can't get enough of Twitter. Not because I enjoy tweeting - my life is so boring that my tweets bring little entertainment to the world.
I enjoy it because i'm nosey. I want to know what everyone else is doing. It's the same with Facebook. I want to know that the girl I went to school with 20 years ago, who used to be hot when I was 10 but now resembles Simon Cowell in a wig is having a tuna sandwich for lunch. These things interest me, not because i'm sad enough to really care about the filling of a sandwich but because it reassures me that my life is good and that i'm doing ok.
OK magazine doesn't interest me but I can sit and read the wattage that Alex Dowsett is putting out on a training ride and actually sit and digest the information as if it's this year's bestseller. Why? Because it fuels my imagination. I want to make myself believe that had I made different choices in life, these people I read about could have been me. I'd like to think that if David Brailsford saw me riding my 2nd hand BMX around the village green, i'd be up there in the mountains giving Andy Schleck "the look" before launching a devastating attack.
The realisation? I have never had the potential to become a professional cyclist because I just don't know how to suffer. To look at what the pros go through is truly humbling. 6 hours in the rain, in January, just to ensure that the base fitness is there for a race in July.
For me, if I look out the window and the clouds look a bit grey, I declare a rest day. Should I be sad about that? I don't think so, it's not as if i'm telling the world that i'm eating a tuna sandwich......

Supplements. Believe the hype?

When I first started cycling, I was desperate to spend money on the sport. So much so, that if you took a shit and stamped a picture of a bicycle on it, I'd probably try to buy it from you.

I think the majority of humans are insatiable - we always want more and are never happy with what we have got. The grass is always greener on the other side (or the tarmac is always smoother if you're more a roadie than a mountain biker).

I am fairly obsessed with cycling and so if I can't be outside riding my bike, I want to be reading about bikes or planning routes to cycle or arranging rides or buying things to do with my bike or cycling or that vaguely resemble cycling. The buying part brings me onto the purpose of today's topic - supplements.

The reason I've been thinking about this is because my sister is training to run a marathon and is currently completing training runs of around 15 miles. She has read a few articles about fueling and decided to ask me what I use whilst I'm cycling.

It's an interesting topic. When I first started to cycle, I used to take a bottle of water and even though the distances were short and one could argue that I was cycling on"stored" energy, I didn't die from hunger or exhaustion.
A couple of months into my new found hobby, I joined ,my local cycling club (Addiscombe CC http://www.addiscombe.org/ ) and threw myself into a 50 mile club run, cheating death with a cup of tea and a Kit Kat.

I read some magazines and found out that I shouldn't be content with merely cheating death, I needed to stick two fingers up and poke death in his/her eyes (no sexism here - I don't work for Sky Sports). My mind was opened to the world of nutritional supplements. In the blink of an eye, I had found a whole new avenue to spend money on. I could almost hear the accountants of Wiggle rubbing their hands with glee.

So, I dived in and bought gels, powders, bars galore and used them whenever I could on a ride and do you know what? I didn't die but I didn't win the Tour de France either.

I'm not saying that supplements are wrong or don't work but I think it's all too easy to get caught up in the hype that goes with them. I've learned that I don't need to take an energy drink on every ride, sometimes a banana is better than a sports packaged cereal bar.

Now, I follow a simple strategy:
30 miles or less - water.
30 - 60 miles - water, a banana or flapjack or an energy drink.
60 plus miles, whatever the media want to throw at me.......

My advice to you, do whatever makes you happy and you think works but respect your body and always have something left in reserve.